Conversations with Emily

Often when I get an idea I play it out in my mind, especially when it comes to writing a skit. Sometimes I use the idea, sometimes I don’t, and occasionally end up with pics that I do not use. I intend capturing some of these moments.

On finding an abandoned shopping trolley near the Carrant Brook…

“Can I push this trolley into the river?”

“Certainly not! You are not a mindless vandal.”

“But everybody else does it.”

“If everybody else jumped off a bridge would you jump off a bridge?

“It depended on whether there was a soft landing or not.”

“Well, if you do decide to dump that trolley into the river be rest assured that you will spend the next week upside down in your box in the cupboard!”

“That’s kind of harsh.”

“What did you expect?”

“Ice cream… “

How does one deal with that kind of logic? 


On going to school…

“Ok, so I get to wear this cool uniform and sit in a classroom with other kids and get taught stuff by an adult in front of a chalkboard/”

“Something like that.”

“It does not sound like fun. I will much rather spend that time surfing the net and looking at crazy cat videos.”

“I am inclined to agree with you. School does stifle creativity.”

“I can be creative, look, I found 17 sites with dolls in them, and 16 of them have profiles on facebook and linkedin! I want a profile on facebook and linkedin!”

“You can’t because you are too young!”

“Too young? but but but…”

“Besides, I am letting you have a portion of my blog to use. I should be charging you a hosting fee!”

“Fee? I am a penniless dolly who doesn’t have 2 pence to rub together.”

“That’s because you spend your pocket money on ice cream and giant hair bows.”


Miss Emily was busted for eating ice cream in class.

“So Miss Emily, can you please explain why you were eating ice cream in class?”

“I had to eat it or it would have melted.”

“Why did you take it to school and not leave it at home in the freezer for when you came home from school?”

“Um… well I kind of bought it on my way to school.”

“Ah, and then you snuck it in and scoffed it during class?”

“Yep, that is it, I tried to eat it during maths class.”

“And the end result was a “Please Explain”?”

“Yep, one of those. Geez, it’s not as if I was doing something bad.”

“I would consider eating ice cream during maths to be a major bad thing, especially if you are not supposed to even have an ice cream in any class. Have you done this before?”

“Nope, never in naths class.”

“Ah, so you have eaten ice cream in a different class?”

“Oops, that was not supposed to come out.”

“Miss Emily, no ice cream for you for a month!”

“Oh pooh, does that mean I will have to throw away the Eskimo Pie in my bag?”

“You have an Eskimo Pie in your bag?”

“Oh yes, I was saving it for geography class.”

“Miss Emily, I think you need to go spend some time in the corner and ponder on your misdeeds after you have thrown away the Eskimo Pie and any other ice cream products that may be lurking in your bag.”

“Can’t I eat them instead?”

“Certainly not. In fact you can give them to me. I will eat them.”

“Mutter mutter…. “

“Don’t mutter to me in that tone of voice. Give me your ill gotten stash before I decide to make things much worse.”

I really enjoyed the ice cream, although how she ended up with three of them I will never know. Hopefully this will be the last we hear of ice cream in school.

 

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